‘Any Woman Is An Enormous Fear Barrier…’ What the…?

This is very weird. I seem to make a lot of noises that are not exactly words. Anyway, here it is here...

Jesus.

What the fuck is ‘late to mid twenties’ when it’s at home?

Anyway, even taking into account my ridiculous levels of embarrassment, I think that went quite well. Unlike the one I’ve just done with Matt Cooper for Today FM. I didn’t enjoy that at all.

You know in Jerry Maguire, when Cuba Gooding’s character is being interviewed by the guy famous for making his guests cry? You remember that? ‘Your father leaves home on Christmas Eve. Your mother had to sweep up to pay your tuition. Your brother lost a leg. You've had a pretty horrific life.’ ‘I’m not gonna cry, Roy.’ Well, this Matt fellow was going in that direction, and the absolute last thing I want is to be on the radio weeping about having a fucked-up childhood. It’s one thing to write it down, quite another to be expected to talk about it. Probably the reason I wanted to write it down in the first place was because I’m no good at talking about it. So I was immediately on the defensive and not enjoying myself. Which meant that I was babbling and stuttering and wandering around and getting breathless. Then he started suggesting that maybe I’m not ugly at all and it’s all a gimmick to sell books. Which I’ve read in a couple of emails this week too. And I really don’t know how to reply to that, except to say, yeah, that’s not beyond the realms of possibility. So what?

No. I didn’t enjoy that one. They said they’d let me know when it’s going to be put out. Not tonight though, as I’d imagined.

Ugh.

Now I’m going to go join another sodding gym and put it all out of my mind.