bulk :: 18st 7 (still in the right direction but a disappointment, especially considering the pain I am still in from physical exertion. I deserved to have lost at least a stone playing tennis.)
cigarettes :: 0
alcohol units :: 20
runs :: 1 (this is poor. More effort required.)
new IM friends snagged :: 1
poodles killed :: 0
valentines day cards received :: 1 (oh yes, finally I received one. Sadly, it was a card professing love for someone else…)
Sal and I are ‘just good friends’…
And this is where the story ends.
She loves her boyfriend (of 12 weeks),
Despite the bumfluff on his cheeks.
Apparently, he’s ‘ace in bed’ -
A fact now burning in my head...
(Her truth delights me, makes me glow,
But some things I don’t need to know.)
IM is fine but IM not
To let myself with her besot.
But unrequitings are my fate,
And now I fear, it’s much too late…
What makes this story so much worse
Is telling it in rotten verse…
…but that’s what Valentine’s Day is all about. Or so I am led to believe. Anyhow, that’s me done with love. Let’s just get on with the ugly stuff.
So last weekend I received an email from the very exciting Glamourpuss concerning Gonzalo Otálora, a Venezuelan chap who’s written a book called ‘Feo’. ‘Feo’, as you may or may not be aware, means ‘ugly’. So I found his blog and dropped him a line. I introduced myself as a fellow freak and suggested that it might be good to do something together – some kind of interview maybe. A couple of days later he wrote back.
‘Thank for wrote me,’ he said. ‘My ingles is very poor….’
Bless. As poor as his ingles is however, I’m sure it’s a darn site better than my Espanish. He’s happy for me to ask him some questions anyway, and reckons that he’ll muddle through. However, as amusing as it might be to see two ugly men floundering around in a pit of poor language skills, I just think it would be better if I could talk to him in his own sweet tongue. So yes, in short, do any of you speak Spanish and fancy helping out on a little ‘ugly hands across the water’ project? I don’t even know what I want to say to him yet, but it would be good to be able to say it in his original language. It’s a gesture, innit?
So far I’ve been relying on Babel Fish, which even I can see is pretty bad. The title of this blog post is courtesy of Babel Fish. ‘Please Help Unite the Ugly Men’. I have no idea how accurate it is. But it’s a computer for God’s sake. And if computers worked, translators would be out of a job. Besides which, it’s all a bit, ‘Open the pod bay door, Hal’ for me. I prefer the human touch. We all need it.
By the way, as you can see from the photo above, he's really not that ugly. The big faker.
Oh and also, while I’m begging favours, does anyone know anything about Facebook? More specifically, if I were to start a group, how would I invite more than just my own friends to join it?
Thanking you in advance.
I leave you with a couple more cards....