Last night I finished going through the proofs of my book. And you know what? I really enjoyed it. It made me weep. Three times! Maybe it’s because I’m so close to it all. Other people might not weep so readily. I also loved the fact that there was lots of stuff that I couldn’t remember writing, so I kept surprising myself. Also, I wasn’t embarrassed by it. I have a mortal fear of embarrassment, so I was very pleased not to feel any.
I did get my first piece of totally objective feedback recently though, from a man called BP Perry. It went like this:
'Books made off of internet blogs are SHIT. Welcome to the bargain bucket, Stan.'
The good thing about this feedback is that it’s based on nothing more than one grim old turd’s gleeful cynicism - without having read the book - and therefore it’s completely worthless. The worrying thing about it, however, is that I’m pretty sure if I hadn’t read the book myself, I would almost certainly agree with him. Off the top of my head, I can think of six books based on blogs which I’ve attempted and in each case failed to get into. Because they weren’t very good. However, not all of them ended up in the bargain bucket. The two sexy ones, for example, which bored me non-stiff, did – I believe – do very well indeed.
Anyway, fuck it. All I wanted to say is that I’m happy with the book, and rather proud of myself. And in these dark, Satanic times, it’s just about the only thing that’s giving me hope.
But now the auto-fellatio must end and I must continue packing up my London life for the impending move north. Fucking hell, I hate the north. But needs must. I’ll explain the whys and wherefores next week when I’ve got a little more time. Now is rather hectic.
In a couple of hours, a bookshop owner is coming round with a van to take away the books I’ve been collecting for the last 15 years or so. There are about 700 of them, and he’s giving me £150 for them. I’m quite pleased because a) I would’ve accepted £50, and b) I have a feeling I’m going to feel much, much lighter when they’re all gone. It feels like losing weight.
My plan is to be out of here by Monday, sleep on couches for a few days and this time next Friday be on a train heading north.
So that’s that. A new era beckons. Fingers crossed it’s not a massive fucking mistake.
Bookscan answer below. Have a great weekend.